What Can Brown Do For You?

You can deliver my effin’ package, that’s what you can do!

Perhaps someone can enlighten me on how this situation can occur. But for now, let me give you the frustrating consumer perspective.

Background. Nicole and I are in the process of preparing for the arrival of our son. So that means taking a close look around the house for obvious hazards. Our living room entertainment center consists of a big-ass TV on top of an open metal and glass stand. Looks great, but all the wires are exposed in the back and it would be incredibly easy for the electronics to be pulled off the shelf. Of course, being a woodworker, I would love to build a suitable wood entertainment center. Unfortunately, there just isn’t enough time right now, so we were forced to buy something that will work in the interim.

I placed the order with Amazon.com last week and took advantage of the free shipping through Amazon Prime. Love me some Prime! So today, we have this call waiting for us on the answering machine:


So apparently, they received a package, transported it to Phoenix, but now have absolutely no way of delivering it to my house??? Could someone please explain how something like this can happen? Fortunately, I have a pickup truck. But I’d be pretty screwed if I didn’t. And unfortunately, I am the only able-bodied person in the family right now so transporting this thing myself and getting it into the house is going to be a bitch! I just wish I knew why UPS would accept a package they have no way to deliver…. This is certainly not the worst thing UPS has done to us (damaged packages), but it is certainly one of the most hilariously moronic.

17 thoughts on “What Can Brown Do For You?

  1. If you can wait until mid afternoon, I can lend a hand. I’ve got to visit a ups place to drop off a package. Don’t care which one I go to.

  2. I’m pretty sure the UPS ground guys have a 70 lb limit , that probably should have went UPS Freight . Those guys deliver anything , they dropped off our wine tanks they were like 1500 # a piece . Hope you get some help with it , can’t see the package being all that huge .

  3. The UPS guy that delivered my jointer looked like an ex-defensive linemen.
    The phoenix UPS terminal need some of those guys.
    110 lbs isn’t really even heavy.
    Good luck Marc.
    (Hey, and in about 18 years of so, you can send junior to make that pick up !)

  4. That’s odd. When I order heavy stuff through Amazon, it usually gets delivered through a different courier, usually Ceva Logistics. I still would but I don’t know that filing a complaint that will mean much. It isn’t like they can refund your shipping costs.

    On another note, I have a similar setup as your new cabinet and I mounted the TV on the wall and ran the cables up inside the wall. Makes it look nice and clean and no worries about the TV tipping over.

  5. This is un-related to your post but you mentioning Amazon Prime reminded me of Amazon Mom. It’s a free service through Amazon so you can get diapers, formula and other baby items through subscribe and save 30% off. I just wish I knew about when my twins were baby’s.


    • FYI, Nicole was looking into this today. looks like its a program that essentially replaces Amazon Prime. So you get some good benefits on baby products, but you no longer have all the advantages of Amazon Prime. Its seems to be an either/or option, from what we can tell.

      • Hi Marc,

        About the Amazon Mom program… I’m a member of Prime, Mom, and Amazon student all at the same time. AFAIK, Amazon Mom only gives you some free prime months (and only up to a year I believe), and then it reverts back to standard super-saver shipping. You still get the 30% off the baby stuff though as long as you’re a Mom member. My wife’s Prime benefits associated with A.Mom ran out months ago, but she still gets the good prices, and could now pay for a Prime membership if she liked.
        Sounds confusing…

  6. I’m with Jerrythey should have shipped it freight. We bought a new cover for the hot tub a couple of months go and they shipped it UPS freight. I had to meet them at a location about a mile down the road due to the fact that the driver wouldn’t have had a place to turn a semi truck aroud at the house but they called and arranged the meeting place and time at my convenience. I woud think they would give the same courtesy for this item unless maybe it was a stipulation of the free shipping.

  7. That is the funniest thing I’ve ever heard. I’m Sorry, but like you said, If you didn’t already have a truck. In my case, I would be calling amazon and UPS in an unpleasant manner till they delivered it.

  8. I know I’m a bit late to the game on this one, but something like 20 years ago I was working for a company that made computer systems that were used by UPS in their sorting facilities. When we went to send a system to one of their facilities for testing and evaluation, UPS said it was too big and heavy for them to handle, so we had to ship it to UPS via FedEx. I can just imagine the FedEx employees all laughing their heads off when they knew they were delivering a package to UPS.

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